41 SIGNS YOU'RE ADDICTED TO THEME PARKS (AND PROUD OF IT)

Let’s be honest. If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve already caught it: The Park Bug. It starts out innocently, a trip to Efteling as a kid, a spontaneous visit to Disneyland Paris, a single YouTube video of a ride POV at Europa-Park and then suddenly you’re watching maintenance updates, memorising queue lengths, and planning entire vacations around opening dates.

There’s no known cure And frankly… I don’t want one. Because if chasing themed lands, riding coasters until sunset, and booking off-season trips to beat the crowds makes us “addicted,” we’ll happily wear that badge.

Not sure if you’re one of us?
Here are 41 signs you might just be a certified theme park addict:

The Obvious Signs

1. Every story starts with, “So there was this time at Efteling…”

2. You have a coaster count and you’re not afraid to share it.

3. You have a favorite rollercoaster and a backup favorite for when it’s under maintenance.

4. You can tell a ride’s manufacturer by the track shape.

5. You’ve argued about Intamin vs. B&M like it's a football rivalry.

6. You plan your holidays around Halloween events and new ride openings.

7. You’ve stood in the rain for a soft opening.

8. You own more ears than shoes.

9. Your “dream destinations” include Dollywood, Liseberg, or Busch Gardens.

10. You’ve been to Disney more times than your hometown’s main square.

The Deep-Cut Signs

11. You know the exact day Danse Macabre  reopens. (December 13th ;))

12. You can recite the entire dialogue from the Tiki Room.

13. You follow theme park permits like people follow celebrity gossip.

14. You’ve booked a flight just because a coaster reopened.

15. You’ve cried during a nighttime show (and you’re not ashamed).

16. You know the ride soundtrack composers by name.

17. You’ve yelled “Mickey” in public.

18. You’ve rearranged your home to fit more merch shelves.

19. You once postponed a life milestone for a trip to Disney.

20. You can find the shortest route between any two rides in your sleep.

The Travel Tells

21. Your suitcase lives half-packed.

22. Skyscanner is permanently open on your laptop.

23. You measure purchases in ticket prices. (“That coat is 2 days at Toverland.”)

24. Your loyalty lies with whoever offers hotel + park + ERT.

25. Your phone suggests to navigate from your home  to Rust, no search needed.

26. Your have at least one theme park related group chat.

27. You’ve stayed in a park hotel just for the early entry.

28. You’ve crossed borders just to visit a park for a single ride.

29. You have a favourite place to watch a nighttime show.

30. You have a separate savings account labeled “Theme Parks Only.”

The Unmistakable Signs

31. You follow park news accounts like they’re breaking CNN exclusives.

32. People tag you when a coaster gets stuck.

33. You’ve tried to explain why you check que times of rides while at work (and failed).

34. Your calendar marks both birthdays and attraction refurbishments.

35. Your photos are 80% character meets and ride selfies.

36. Your ringtone is literally a theme park soundtrack.

37. You have a strong opinion about which park  has the best snacks.

38. You’ve debated a dark ride scene like it’s Oscar-worthy cinema.

39. Your “retirement plan” includes moving near a park.

40. You’ve made a spreadsheet of park visits. For fun.

41. You’re reading this list, nodding, laughing and already planning your next trip.

So… Is There a Cure?

Not really, but do we need one? Theme parks give us something precious:
A place to wonder.
A place to play.
A place where we can be ourselves, no matter our age, background, or weekday job title.

Whether it’s the click of a lift hill, the smell of churros, or the sheer joy of screaming next to strangers on a steel dragon, we’re in it for the magic. So here’s to the dreamers. The queue nerds. The coaster counters. Here’s to you.

And hey… if you ever need someone to ride shotgun, I’ve got FastPass fingers and popcorn budgets. Let’s go.

With Love,

Jolanda